Reply to Are birthday party politics really so intense or is this a DCUM thing?

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "Are birthday party politics really so intense or is this a DCUM thing?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]Think it's two things...

1) I do think it's mostly DCUM. Part of that is the anon nature of the board, having a large pool of people to draw from (thus even if it's a small %, a large absolute number of fretting or judging people), the fact that etiquette-type are "fun"/divisive questions that get a lot of responses, etc. Part is that it clearly attracts UMC and wealthy mostly white people, who tend to get more uptight about this kind of thing. I'd say ironically, since those people have a lot of money, but it's not ironic at all.

I am a kind of judgy person in some respects-- at least I *notice* all kinds of odd details-- but if I think about all the kid parties my ES kid has been invited to (maybe 30 since she was a toddler?), I just can't remember one I felt judgy (or inadequate) about. Really wracking my brain here. And we've been to ones at almost all SES levels, venues or lack thereof, food, favors, invitee list, etc. all varying widely. I can think of one time I felt very mildly judgy about a party where kids were invited, but it wasn't a kid birthday party, and it was just the mildest judgment about what they offered the kids.

2) I think a lot (most?) of the posts here are from OPs who are fretting about being judged, not people who are actually judging some other host. That then attracts people who want to vent about the one time some other host was weird, or who want to take the opportunity to point out their superior hosting skills. So even the judgiest people are usually only talking about the 1-in-30 bad experience they had or judged negatively. Most aren't walking around IRL thinking everyone is a bad host but them. Does that make sense? When we're talking about people who actually take the time and energy to post a new thread, it's more folks worrying they'll do something wrong than people actually complaining about how offended they are. Those people come out of the woodwork when given an opportunity to vent! But it's generally not serious or widespread enough for them to start a whole thread about how terrible some other host was.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics