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[quote=Anonymous]DH grew up working class and he never learned these things. I've had to teach him, and still remind him that you never show up to something like this empty-handed. Whether someone is inviting you to dinner party or on vacation, you should bring something. It doesn't need to be expensive at all!!! It can be a $10 bottle of wine or a box of chocolates or plate of homemade cookies, but it's something to show your appreciation. How people perform these little rituals are a marker of socio-economic class. It is commonly accepted in upper-middle class, well-educated circles that you bring a token gift when invited to someone's home for anything more than a cup of coffee or a playdate.

When we invite our children's friends out, we do not expect them to pay for any meal or excursion. They can use pocket money to buy themselves little souvenirs or trinkets, but participating in a meal or event is not something that I expect for them to pay for themselves as a guest.

BTW, I think that the people who consider this "bean counting" are just embarrassed by their lack of proper upbringing. Change it now. Don't dig in your heels. Teach your children differently. [/quote]

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