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Reply to "If your parents divorced when you were young-"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My DD had a friend whose parents divorced & they a)kept the family home & b)got a condo relatively nearby (also in DMV). Then the parents, not the child, rotated. So the parents had to live out of a bag, not their DD. I think it was big of the adults to do this. I am also a child of divorce, although my parents didn't split until I was in college. I cannot agree enough with PPs that it would help tremendously if the adults involved could be present in the same space without acrimony so that all future events (graduations, marriages, etc.) were not fraught with tension. One of my best friends splits 50:50 custody with her ex of their 16yo DC & they have worked so hard to become amicable. I am so proud of her/them. They will likely know I'm talking about them here bz it's such a telling detail, but they all (exes + new spouses + DC) attend trivia nights together as a team. +1000 for this couple, who are definitely doing this for the kids (it took awhile, but nobody wanted to live with bitterness).[/quote] OP here. We have talked about us rotating in and out for the sake of the kids. I worry a lot about how soon to be ex would respect and maintain mutual shared space. One of my concerns would be that whichever parent is in the family home with the kids has to take time away from the kids for cleaning/laundry/grocery shopping etc. I know that is real life for any parent but I hate that bc my ex decided to split, I only get to see my kids 50% of the time. I'd like that time I do get with them to be focused on them, not on cleaning and shopping or potentially reversing anything he may not have attended to while with them.[/quote] It's up to you in the end, but I kind of disagree that you should do this. I'd trust your gut here - you already know how he runs things from being married to him. Your husband unilaterally ended the marriage and now seems to want you to sacrifice an awful lot for his decision. I'm not advocating that you become acrimonious towards each other, but don't be afraid to stand up for yourself a little bit. You have a lot of healing to do.[/quote]
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