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[quote=Anonymous]Be complimentary of the decor, the food, and the thoughtful planning.  Tell your son how lucky he is to have such a wonderful wife & what a treat it is to be a guest.

Don't assume that your DIL is the default for all things home /cooking / entertaining and ask your son too.  He may defer, but at least it's not sending the message that you expect her to be doing something because she's the wife/mom.

Look into some things you might enjoy doing outside of the house if you'll be visiting long enough.  Don't insist on doing them, but have ideas to contribute if the hosts ask.   I find it so exhausting to have to get the house ready, shop and plan the meals, AND think of ways to entertain a houseful of stir-crazy people.

Really play with the kids, offer to give them a bath, read with them, put them to bed -- or to clean up the kitchen while the parents are handling that.  Take the kids in the morning so the parents can sleep or have a quiet coffee.  Take them to the park, movies, other outing.  Be respectful of family policies on snacks, screen time, and sleep schedules.

Offer to help but be prepared to hear a no and don't be weird about it.

Have a nice time.  [/quote]

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