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[quote=Anonymous]I am in a similar boat. My DH does a lot around the house but he WILL NOT help at night. We have a 3 year old with special needs who does not sleep through the night and we have a 5 month old. Between the two kids, I am up 3-6 times per night. My DH is a very deep sleeper and he needs a lot more sleep than I do to function. He says he feels physically ill when he gets less than 6 hours of sleep.

I resented him so much and it was creating serious distance. Finally, we saw a counselor and were able to have a productive discussion. We arrived to an agreement that we both feel good about and my husband makes sure to let me know that he appreciates the hard work I am doing at night. He now gets up an hour earlier and does the entire morning routine while I sleep. This gives me 2 extra hours of sleep in the morning which has actually made a big difference. I think the biggest thing was DH acknowledging how unfair it is that he is choosing to sleep and leaving me in the trenches, even if it’s “not his fault” because of what a heavy sleeper he is. As soon as he owned that, I was much more willing to find a compromise. Before, my blood would boil anytime I thought about it.

Another thing that worked for us- my husband takes care of all the dishes and lunch packing, as well as making my coffee in he morning. He also makes sure the dishwasher is emptied and the trash is taken out before he leaves for work. Helps set us up for a more successful day. [/quote]

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