Reply to DH wants less responsibility and less pay

Forum Index » Jobs and Careers

Reply to "DH wants less responsibility and less pay"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think people are asking about OP being a SAHP because most people who work know how awful some jobs can be and the toll that can take on your mental health and overall wellbeing. [b]So when someone is completely different to their spouses concern's and only cares about $$, that comes across as maybe they don't understand the challenges of the workplace. [/b]OP says she works but it sounds like her work environment is such that she just can't relate.

I am someone who thinks well-being and mental health and quality of life are a thousand times more important than status or class or luxury or wealth so I always think that open honest conversation about budget and overall well-being are good. I would never expect my spouse to stay in a job they hated. I have been in one and know how it can really be damaging and I would have a hard time being with someone who didn't care about my health or well-being. I am a woman so I don't really have to worry about being seen as $$ by my partner. [/quote]

OP is not indifferent. Last year, her DH took a pay cut and changed jobs so he would be “less stressed.”  Now he wants to do it again. Last year, he was making 100K and he changed jobs to the 80K job. Now he has THE SAME complaints as he had about the first job and wants to take another pay cut.

Come on! She’s been understanding and his complaints/stress/anxiety remain the same regardless of what job he has. She’s already picking up the slack, she’s the default parent, she already supported him through a job change (for a paycut) AND she still has to listen to him complain about how working sucks all the time. If he takes another paycut this year that’s almost a 50% paycut in TWO years! And he’s still going to be complaining to OP and stressed all the time - remember the relevant factors aren’t changing - commute, type of job, etc. It sounds like her DH has anxiety and he’d feel the same way even if he was a SAHD, he’s always going to have “something” to stress about.

OP, I would insist that he see a psychologist before he makes any more job changes. (At a minimum see a marriage therapist - and maybe a divorce lawyer just in case...) Honestly, you sound like a saint! [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics