Reply to How to kindly turn down hocom ask?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]"No thanks."  She doesn't owe him a reason why. If she wants, she can (quietly, so as not to embarrass him) say "I don't think we like each other in the same way."

But "No" is actually a complete sentence.[/quote]

There are some really nasty people on these boards. I don’t think that’s a nice way to let someone down. Don’t you want to raise your kids to be kind?[/quote]

I want to raise my kids to protect themselves FIRST, and be kind SECOND.  As a feminist, I hate when a woman (or girl) turns down a guy by saying "I already have a boyfriend/date" because to me that's like saying "I'm already owned by someone else." And that encourages a man to respect another MAN rather than to respect a woman who simply says "No thank you." Women do NOT owe reasons why when they turn down men. [/quote]

Oh Jesus, pipe down. [/quote]

+100
Honestly, there’s always someone just *looking* for a problem where none exists.  People like the PP are constantly on the offensive and it’s absurd.

OP, I agree with the posters who suggested nicely telling him she had already been asked by someone else and didn’t quite know how to tell him.  But if there’s a similar situation again, she should be straightforward and kind immediately by saying thank you so much for the invitation, but (insert excuse).  The most important thing is to be kind.  It’s SO hard for boys to put it all out there and then get rejected, no matter how kindly.  [/quote]

IMO, considering “no thank you” an impolite response and demanding an excuse is looking for a problem. I’m sure it’s hard for boys to put themselves out there, but just because they ask doesn’t mean they’re owed anything more than a yes or no. If they don’t want to take the risk of hearing no, they can ask someone they know better. This boy isn’t even friends with OP’s DD or her friends, and she’s already told him no once before. [/quote]

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