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[quote=Anonymous]After the birth of our first child, I need up taking up most of the slack regarding the new chores relating to the child.  One day I got upset and I wrote a list of what I was doing on one side of the piece of paper and and list of what he was doing (mostly the same stuff her did prior to children).  I asked him to add to the lit anything that I forgot.  Then,  we discussed what would an equitable division.  He ended up taking over the laundry and a few other things.  However, he is more of a neatnic in our family and had to learn to let a few things slide in that regard.  If you are the neatnic in your family, you may breed to let things slide too.

Once your DH gets back to work, consider getting an every other week house cleaner.  That was one of our greatest investments.

Look at cooking meals on the weekend that your DH can pull from the fridge and heat up to prepare for dinner when you get home.  When you cook, cook double and triple recipes for freezing- same amount of time for you double/triple number of dinners. If you cook just twice over the weekend, you can get 4 more dinners out of the way for upcoming week.  Once you build up options, it won’t be so repetitive.   Learn to love easy to make meals ( salad in a bag with a frozen fish burger fried on top), serve with fruit, cheese and fresh bread.

I don’t think it is too much for him to ask fro two hours a day without childcare to do things he needs to do to stay sane (job search and exercise).  I would suggest that you add some time to your day away for exercise too. Or you can take your child out in the buggy and walking around the neighborhood for 30-45 minutes, while your DH has his 2 hours- that would be a win-win win-  you and your child get alone time together, you get some exercise and your DH gets relief from being home all day with a one year old.

Laundry is something that your DH should be able to do at home.  It doesn’t take long to do the swaps (in/out of washer/dryer) and you can do what I did with young children at home (including one that loved to upset a newly folded load of laundry).  I learned to fold 3-4  things and put them away.  Then fold 3-4 more things and put them away.  Over the course of the day, Landry would be folded and put away.

I would investigate if your DH has some depression issue- not uncommon with such a life change of adding a child and unemployment in the same timeframe.

I think calls for finding a counselor for both of you to learn how to communicate better and find your new norm are well founded.  [/quote]

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