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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Thank you so much for sharing, and hugs to all of you. I've never told anyone because I come from a 'good' background and have a stable and happy life, and I doubt anyone would believe me if I described even a fraction of what I went through.

I was thinking the other day about how almost everyone I interact with has no idea, and whether I would know if one of my friends had had similar experiences ('abuse-dar' for lack of a better term). One follow-up - do any of you who responded think you can sense when someone else has had similar experiences? I know I wonder when someone speaks coldly of their parents.

I worry about whether I'll be able to keep hiding it when my parents die (particularly my mother). I am bracing for the day I have to 'act' like a grieving daughter (with deep apologies for this comment to those of you who lost parents you loved and grieved them). [/quote]

OP, you may be surprised at how deeply you grieve your parents when they pass away. Brace yourself - or better yet, prepare yourself - for that. It's the final closed door on a basic human need to have a loving relationship with your parents, the loss of a deeply felt hope for the positive connection you deserved but didn't experience. [/quote]

Nonsense. If a parent was really awful in their lifetime, then wouldn’t there be relief when they’re dead? [/quote]

Because it's never that simple...isn't that obvious? This stuff is complex and difficult to interpret, understand, process. You don't just get one feeling...you probably get all of the feelings. Relief, grief, sadness, anger, loss, freedom, etc etc[/quote]

It depends on the person I think. For me, I'm actually counting down the days for my abusive mom to pass away. She's contirbuted nothing to my life and I would be so glad to watch her die.[/quote]

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