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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Every. Single. Day.

My college sweetheart, best friend/boyfriend. I just realized right now that it was 20 yrs ago that we started dating in college.

We both are married, two kids...but not a birthday goes by that I don't hear from him.  He was also one of the first to reach out after my mother died and "congratulated" me the morning of my wedding via FB messenger. I love my husband and my boys, but DAMN do I think about this guy everyday. [/quote]

This is sweet and very similar to how I feel about my first real love. We both have our own lives and are happy but there is a fondness there that will never go away. It's not an "I want to be with you and talk to you all the time" love, it's a "you are a great person who meant a lot to me and helped shape me into who I am and I will never not want good and happy things for you because of that" love. It's a gift. It's an anchor to the past: these things I remember aren't made up or in my own head or one sided. The other person who was there remembers and keeps them too. There have been times over the years I have shared vaguely a memory or story that means something to me and he will acknowledge it. Not in a creepy or prowling way but in a "I know what you're talking about because I remember it too" way.

I think I'm rambling. I don't miss him. I just feel like there is one tiny sliver of my heart that holds him and I am confident he feels the same. We are not significant to one another any longer, we never speak or engage, but that bond is always there. I will always love him for the person he was at that time in my life and all the memories I have that feature him.  Like a PP said, I would absolutely never ruin this by trying to reignite something or reach out and cross that threshold of the past. That's where he stays because for me that's where he is his best and most perfect version of himself. [/quote]

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