Reply to How hard to find a 1/2 time boyfriend in early 40s?

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Reply to "How hard to find a 1/2 time boyfriend in early 40s?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op, this is harder than You’d think.  I’m you.  Divorced, have 2 older elementary kids.  I want a regular exclusive relationship with a guy with no expectation of marriage.  Just fabulous sex and fun when we are together... no meeting my kids, no meeting his kids.

This is easy to find for a few months.  Then around the 3-4 month mark, they all start falling in love. Want to meet kids.  Talk marriage.  Uggggghhhh.  Sorry, I don’t want that.

Mark my word.  The men fall hard and fast, and they are needy and want someone to take care of them.  [/quote]

Not another one!  LOL

PP--why do you think you are entitled to an "exclusive relationship with a guy with no expectation of marriage"?  Why do you think any remotely desirable male would ever agree to such a thing?

If it's clear you have no expectation of marriage, then by definition, you are saying the relationship is temporary, and intended to be temporary.  Why on Earth do you think you are entitled to "exclusivity" from the guy?

You will either end up with guys who are lying to you, and not really "exclusive" (just like you're lying to them, since you seem to have run through a lot of these relationships); or guys who are only investing the time with you in the hopes that they  can change your mind (only to be disappointed).

This keeps happening to you, yet, you find fault with the guys, and don't understand what's happening.

What's happening is that even though you SAY you don't want a committed relationship, merely by insisting on exclusivity, (and probably in other ways), you are signalling to these guys that you are at least open to the possibility, when you're really not.

That's called "bait and switch."[/quote]

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