Reply to One year after I ended my affair and I’d appreciate hearing from those who BTDT

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[quote=Anonymous]As others have pointed out, it has nothing to do with the AP.  You're trying to escape from your real life.  AP is irrelevant.

All I can say is working full-time and raising small kids is HARD.  In my experience and from talking to other women, it is the darkest time in any marriage.  During this time, if you allow yourself outlets that have the potential to permanently mess up your life and your children's life, it's just weak-willed.  Look, who doesn't want that rush of a first date or new sex with someone who isn't the guy we wake up to every morning and argue with about who is emptying the dishwasher or look at across the room with two diaper-wearing totally dependent humans standing between us.  You're not special or unique.  But reality check -- you acted on these feelings and put your whole family and life at jeopardy.  Bad move.  Now you feel even worse than when you started.  And the reality is, life as a divorced mom will suck even worse than your current setup.  And probably for longer.

Buckle down.  Let time pass.  Be kind to each other in these years so you don't do permanent damage.  Plan date nights.  Try to get away for a night or two with your DH without kids if you can.  Remind yourself why you chose your DH.  Go to therapy.

Good luck.[/quote]

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