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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, how would you like her to express sadness?  Have you practiced those techniques together?  Kids don’t actually grow out of this stuff organically, they just find different coping mechanisms.  You were hoping she would find the coping mechanism of bottling up her feelings because you value being “brave and strong” over emotional awareness and openness and because it is less work for you if she just suppresses her emotions.  That is bad parenting all around.  Figure out some healthy strategies to actually express sadness rather than hide it and then work together on those.[/quote]

Can you suggest some alternative coping mechanisms?  My 12 yo cries pretty easily and I know it bothers her.  (Once I saw she had googled, 'why do I cry so much?')  I was never much of a crier, and her older sister tends not to be bothered by nearly as much.  In part, I think this is a confidence thing (her older sister has more of a 'go to hell' attitude for issues where the younger one would cry).  Tangible suggestions for a different way to express her emotions when she clearly doesn't want to do so by crying?  [/quote]

Did you google it yourself?  Here are some. https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/319778.php FYI- My 12 yr old (boy) who is wired this way will now occasionally run down the hall to his quite room or even a closet when really piss him off.  I consider that his own form of "mediation." Sort of cracks me up but not a bad coping strategy.  Really I'd brainstorm with her about what she thinks might work and then have her have three options in mind that she can try next time she feels overwhelmed.[/quote]

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