Reply to Spouse wants to accompany on work travel; I don't want her

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[quote=Anonymous]OP you just sound like a rigid and selfish man. After 16 years your DW asks to come along on a trip where you have a hotel room. In those 16 years presumably she knows how these monthly work trips are work trips. And, presumably since this is 16 years since the last trip, your DW is at least 40yo at this point?? so she is a mature adult and whether you recognize it or not able to function on her own as you leave her by herself every month for these same 4 days?   Your plan is to fly out Tuesday and work W-F and, while work is over Friday night (as you say you could do a red-eye) you return Saturday. Lets pretend you have a working dinner Tuesday and so wife would be on her own all day Wed-Friday. That means that you could meet for a late dinner Friday night (if you want to pretend that you will be working until when that redeye flight would have been scheduled and then you TWO could have whatever time before flight Saturday.  As PPs have mentioned – the $1000 flight cost is not real and you or your DW could use Lyft as needed so no where near $400 for a second car.

You could take some of that imaginary money not spent OP and even extend the trip by one day (paying for hotel where you are or gasp! – driving that hour back towards San Diego!) You could even turn in your car earlier and Lyft or when you rent – get the weekly rate probably making it a wash (as your company didn’t mind you not taking redeye and already gave you extra car and hotel day.)

My DH travels a lot. Once a year I try and go on one of his trips some times for whole week if especially fun place. He works very long hours but I enjoy the novelty of being somewhere else (obviously your wife had some desire for something as she asked.) I could luxuriate in sleeping in once DH left for work, go explore city on my own or be as lazy as I wanted to be. If I didn’t also have to work (I do have flexibility that way) I could be as busy or indulgent as our budget allowed (which sometimes meant that one of my first trips was to grocery store to buy milk and cereal for the week!) When he can – DH adds a day at beginning or end so we have some fun time together (and we always have the nights!) OP please just be honest! You cannot fathom doing anything that would allow your wife a little bit of pleasure at little or no cost to yourself.[/quote]

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