Reply to 12 year old hit nanny. WWYD?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So, what do all of you think nanny should have done after 12 year old tripped the sibling and obvious repeated reprimands from nanny prior to even that? All the behavioral issues justify that too? This is a serious situation and OP needs to take her child to therapy and have a professional opinion on how to handle so much aggression. OP, does your child have proper remorse for this action or not due to autism and other issues? If not, is he/she in behavioral therapy?[/quote]

The book, the Explosive Child, is helpful. Kids will do the right thing if they can. OP’s kid cannot, right now. Piling punishment on a kid prone to rage will bring the rage on. Not back it down. Reflexive communication is better. Be his frontal lobe for him and help him walk through the issues. Bring him in on the problem solving. Walking your ADHD kid through this consistently will help him build his own skills of deflecting range and inappropriate impulsive violent behavior.

I’m all for comsequences for normal situations.  But a tendency toward violence/rage is different and the kid has to be handled differently.  Of course, therapy is a must. [/quote]

Yes, if your child is violent, coddle them.  Consequences are totally inappropriate.  [/quote]

Helping a child who has diagnoses that go hand in hand with missing social and communication skills and are accompanied by a lack of flexibility learn the skills he doesn’t naturally have is not coddling. It’s preparing him for the future. [/quote]

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