Reply to Annoyed that I end up looking like the a-hole who missed Christmas

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Annoyed that I end up looking like the a-hole who missed Christmas "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Let it go.  Don’t rely on him next time.  My DH has ADHD and I would never count on him to wash my clothes.[/quote]

Come on, all it sounds like he had to do was move clothes from the washing machine to the dryer. What kind of person are you that married someone who is literally incapable of being an adult? Shit, I could move the laundry along when I was a kid in middle to late elementary school. [/quote]

Many threads on DCUM over the years about "how do I cope with my ADHD spouse's inability to do things around the house" etc.

OP, look up those threads. Then you and DH need to talk immediately and seriously and start working on giving him tools to cope with mundane but necessary tasks, or you will be back here when the baby comes along, talking about his your marriage is in shambles because DH. Cannot. Help. At. All.

Go online and research how couples where one has ADHD create lists, chore charts, use phone reminders with alarms that sound, etc. Get some short term couples counseling focused on helping you both come up with processes, reminders, solutions so he doesn't forget chores. Does he accept that he has ADHD and that it affects how you regard him? And get help on communications so he understands, and you get better at expressing, why certain very ignorable chores (in his brain) are important enough to you and to the household that he needs to accept help, reminders etc. to get them done. He has a condition that he may not realize helps create problems for HIM like his wife missing his family event. Does he acknowledge that you at a minimum had no wearable clothes ? Were you clear that if there were no clothes you couldn't go out again? (BTW I would have let the food shopping go because there are both some stores and restaurants open after 7 Christmas Eve and even on Christmas Day now, but that's me. And moot.)

Do this work on organization and tools ASAP or the baby is going to rock your lives and not in a good way.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics