Reply to Is this cheating? What do I do? (Found computer history on DH’a computer)

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Is this cheating? What do I do? (Found computer history on DH’a computer)"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here thanks. Sorry about the didn’t let myself go narrative I just hear it said so many times on DCUM about the woman withholding sex or letting herself goand therefor deserving this .... so just wanted to preempt that....

Appreciate other insights of what is “normal”[/quote]
Stop apologizing... stop trying to rationalize as “normal” that your husband is seeking out sexual services. Deal with this problem, which is in no way your fault.[/quote]

+1.  The question isn’t is this “normal”?  The question is “do i want a person who has done this in my life?”

I don’t care how many men cheat on their wives, how many men use prostitutes, how many men have emotional affairs, how many men lie to their wives.  When my DH was doing all these things, I wasted a lot of time trying to understand why.  I finally decided I didn’t care why or whether it was “normal”.  I didn’t want to live with a person who did those things.  I didn’t want to live in the environment of fear, lack of trust and instability created by those behaviors.  And, I certainly didn’t want to grow up role modeling for my daughter and son that that kind of behavior was acceptable.

In addition, as a human rights activist I had a lot of experience with human trafficking, and I couldn’t live with a person who participated as a perpetrator in the sex industry.  The exception to that might be ethical porn-viewing.

It once was normal to negotiate for your wife like a piece of property.  It once was normal to beat your wife.  And, until the early 1970’s marital rape was not a crime.

My life, my choice.  My kids, also my choice as to how to parent them.  I’m not giving my power away to others to determine what is “normal” and therefore must be tolerated by me. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics