Reply to 3 year old son constantly hurts little brother

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Reply to "3 year old son constantly hurts little brother"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP you might benefit from the Kazdin method.  I read a "lite" version of it when my DS2 was born and it helped.

BTW, I follow Janet Lansbury and she's not against consequences.  You just have to be calm about it and it's best of they're logical.

Also one more thing: things go so much more smoothly in the house when DS1 is out of the house for at least half day at presschool or camp or whatever.[/quote]

Thanks. Yes, he did FINE the weeks he was in VBS. And during school he’s better. But now, day after day until school starts...

What consequences do you do?[/quote]

I'm 13:58 again.

I use time out as a consequence.  Mainly "You don't get to spend time with me and your brother if you are hitting/kicking etc, so you need to go to your room".  I also find that when my older one is starting to get "punchy" and I can tell she's going to get rough, I find focusing on just her for a minute helps.  Saying "you seem like you are having a hard time" and just pulling her into my lap for a minute helps.  I try to do that BEFORE getting upset and angry.  She wants to be focused on.  The hard part is the 1 year old sees that and then is ON ME LIKE GLUE to try to get the attention as well.  It's a tough balance.

Get them out of the house as much as possible.  Have a little structure.  Our hardest times are when we've spent too long at home with "unstructured" play time.  So we need to move locations at a minimum.  The park, a walk, even just going to play in the basement helps immensely when they start at each other.[/quote]

Thanks. We definitely get out of the house. And we stay home. I know DCUM likes to say to get out of the house AND leave time for unstructured play. So there ya go.

Unfortunately many of the times the aggression is sudden and “hidden”. The baby will start crying and I’ll realize DS1 is pinching him. Or DS1 will just go up to DS2 in the other room and hit him with a block. MOST OF THE TIME it’s sudden and unwarranted. All of the obvious times I can stop.[/quote]

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