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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  To be clear, it's not a court issue, and we are all happy with the parenting time situation.  DH's ex doesn't want more (and cannot handle more).

His ex would pay if he asked (she has the money), but she cries and complains about how unhappy she is in life, how she wishes they were still together, that everything is unfair, etc.  
[/quote]

I have a friend that does more of the parenting than her ex although they have 50/50 custody and she ends up paying for the kids clothes, more than half the activities etc.  When I asked once, why she didn’t make more of a push with her ex, she explained that these are her kids.  She wasn’t going to not get them clothes because her ex was being an a&& and she didn’t want to fight with him to take more time with the kids, as though they were a burden to be passed off.  So while it wasn’t fair, because it wasn’t a necessity, she didn’t want to take on that conflict and risk her kids feeling caught in the middle.  I’m not sure what I would do in the same situation and I could see her point.

To the OP, why won’t your DH ask?  Is it based on past experience where it caused  lots of drama and in the end she still didn’t pay?  Is it a gender, taking care of my kids type of things?  If it’s that would he see the money differently if it would allow him to save towards their college?  Like rather than seeing this is paying for clothes, activities or health insurance this instead will help enable him to provide extras like help towards college.  What would he do if you hadn’t joined households?  Would he have pushed the ex to contribute, taken on a 2nd job, or lowered his expenses?  [/quote]

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