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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mother in law is a very nice person. She lost her husband, my father in law, in a sudden way last year and I think it has left a "scar" of trauma to her life. She won't even go to the mall because they used to go there. Or Costco. Well, 7 months after his passing she started spending time with a family friend and now they are dating. Like going on trips together and sleeping over dating. We no longer live near her so part of me is glad she has someone to spend time with. Another part of me is wondering if this guy is an opportunist. I know I can't butt in but it's making everyone act strangely. My husband's brother hasnt seen her in 3 months over it. My husband has told her she can't come to visit with him because it's too confusing for the kids. I feel like I'm watching it from the outside.. and I feel like she has become very dependant on this man and I'm worried. He spends all day with her it seems. She owns a business and I'm not sure what he does all day.  [/quote]

I was in your position only it was my surviving parent who developed a close friendship that developed into a serious BF.   Research him.  Does he have grown children?  I assume he's retired?  From what?  If there are no financial repercussions to your MIL and he doesn't deprecate the deceased father/grandfather and your MIL has good companionship THEN accept this man as you would a nice BF/GF of ANY family member.

It's traumatic to lose your partner of [I assume] multiple decades.   No getting around it.  I'm in such a marriage.   Well MIL isn't dead - her husband is-  time to be mature adults and recognize FIL/father is not returning.   Honestly if they can't even eat in a restaurant or have dinner with MIL and her BF this is truly odd.  BTDT with my sib behaving in such a fashion.

So mean to the MIL on the part of her kids.   Honestly what do people expect?   [/quote]

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