Reply to Not sure if I should be mad at my mother or son--or mad at all!

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  I did tell my son that since he feels he needs different toys, perhaps he has outgrown the toys he has and needs to give some away.  The thought of getting rid of toys is usually daunting for him so I was hoping that would serve as enough of a lesson.  But I do plan to follow through on it as it's at least one way to get the old junk out before the birthday onslaught begins.  But that was going to happen anyway--it'll just happen a few weeks early.  It's just tricky because a lot of the stuff that DS1 has outgrown is still age-appropriate for DS2 so I don't want to get rid of those toys--it's DS2's old toys that I want to get rid of.

I do like the one in, one out rule--I actually hold myself to that rule with clothes and jewelry. And I definitely sneak toys into the donation bin and trash can a lot.

Another part of the issue is that DS1 has a strong personality (obviously) so we butt heads more than I would like about a lot of things.  He can be difficult.  So having to deal with creating conflict over something as silly as too many toys is just frustrating.  I have enough conflict with the child--there is no reason for this to be yet another one.  And to make matters worse, it's my mother who is causing the conflict.  After being told again and again to stop.  It's almost like she is trying to purposely sabotage me and make my life harder, which just pisses me off.  For example, DS will ask for a snack 15 minutes before we eat dinner or lunch.  My mother, instead of just saying no like a normal person, will just pause, I will say "no, we are eating soon" and she will say "well, DS, mommy said no so you have to wait".  WTF????  How about backing me up a little?

I just feel like she isn't on my side and is willing to sell me out if it means she gets to be the hero.  I have multiple examples of this and have talked to her time and time again.  And my kid is too young to understand that I'm trying to look out for his best interest.[/quote]

Wow, you are totally mental. [/quote]

+1
you are the mom. why are you competing who is the hero? 
my iaws (so not even my parents) are much more permissive than I am. All the time with them is fun and almost nothing is asked of my kids. So what? I let them be "heros", that's what grandparents are for. [/quote]

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