Reply to Husband has checked out as a parent

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Husband has checked out as a parent"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't understand this whole thing about he doesn't know how to get the kids to bed.  Has he "shadowed you" a few times while you do it?  What is so difficult?  You should be able to have at least a monthly ladies night out while he takes care of dinner and bedtime routine.  I think you are enabling his helplessness.[/quote]

It's not difficult.  He doesn't think it's necessary to do it her way and he wants to do it his way.  She doesn't like his way, so she doesn't go out.[/quote]

OP here, just to be clear, if he had a way, if for instance he wanted to feed the kids hot dogs and mac n cheese or toast with butter and than skip a bath or read 5 books instead of 3, I wouldn't care. As long as the end result was the same-kids were fed and in bed. I don't care about methods, I care about the end result. But there's no end result. I've gone to doctor appointments and come back and kids haven't eaten any meals whatsoever and are [b]going through the pantry while he's on the computer or on his phone. That's what irks me, because than I get mad at him and than it always ends up with him sulking.[/b] [/quote]

OP, I posted earlier, but this really sounds like there's something going on with him.  If he's not depressed, does he have some sort of internet addiction issue?  ADHD?  Deeper marital issues where he's "checked out" to the relationship in general?  It's not normal for an adult to not be able to put aside the phone for long enough to pour your kids a bowl of cereal.  It's also not normal to sulk when you come home and say "why are the kids digging through the pantry at 9:00pm instead of in bed?"  Normal for him to get defensive, but not to huff and puff and sulk every time you ask him to do anything.

What if you set reminders on his phone at dinner and bath time?  Or called him to remind him?  That would help identify if he's actually forgetting to feed them or is intentionally ignoring their needs.  Either way, you two need counseling STAT.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics