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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There's no more to the story. the wrong race, poor, no education and was a glam model. Think she's a gold digger.  Think she should have had an abortion.  They view her as ruining my brother's life even though he was a grown man at the time.

I don't know what my SIL knows of the situation, I wouldn't be surprised if it's nothing. [u]I don't know if he's paying child support I don't think that's my business to ask. [/u]

Anyway, I think I'll just be honest with her and go from there. I'd feel bad about lying either way.[/quote]

Wrong.  He fathered a child, he better be paying for that child.  In fact, he should be doing a hell of a lot more than just that.

[/quote]

Of course he better, but that is 100% not in OP's view to take care of.

OP I echo letting her know you can't at that time but before or after and not tell her why- that's just mean for no reason. I also think, yes, sometimes you have to go to shit that isn't actually mandatory but would rather not have fall out from if there will be any. I think if you feel like talking to your family about this is going to be "breaking big news" to them, which it sounds like it might be, I would do it in a way that is totall divorced from the new baby/baby shower etc, that just throws gasoline on the situation [/quote]

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