Reply to Fiancé doesn't want to live more than 15 mins from family.

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[quote=Anonymous]Big red flag.  You need to resolve it (really resolve it) or else it will come up again later on when it is worse.

I moved away from my family for DH.  At the time it made sense so I didn't really fight it.  Then I pushed to have kids/house and my DH feels like he was pushed into something he wasn't ready for.  Then my family moved closer (parents and sibling separately) and now DH feels trapped and wants to move away closer to his sister (his mom and sister don't live close to each other).

However, the marriage is in such disrepair that I wouldn't give up everything (my family, job and friends) to move again.  It is the elephant in the room and surfaces whenever he is upset (small irritations turn into him not being happy and wanting to move) and there is no good compromise.  Moving halfway means everyone is unhappy.  Keep him here and he will be miserable.  Move me and I will be miserable.   Plus now there are two kids in the mix so even if he leaves me he won't leave the kids so instead he chooses to be more aggressive and that just has the opposite effect of what he wants - because the meaner he gets, the less I would ever think of moving with him.

Awful situation.  Make sure you are on the same page.  Kids (we were on the same page when we got married but then 6 years in he still wasn't ready) and where to live.  They are deal breakers and can destroy a marriage.[/quote]

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