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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I wonder if OP really understood how low drive DH was when they married.  This is why I think people who say it's best to be celibate until marriage are stupid.  It's dumb to marry someone without having had a fairly long sexual relationship first.  Many people are not sexually compatible.  I broke up with two people over that issue.[/quote]

Another poster, not OP.  My relationship prior to H was high sex but not that compatible on a number of fronts. I was so happy that H and I were compatible in most areas, and back when we met, we were having sex once or twice a week. Not bad, right? We "forced" ourselves to have sex once a week when our children were babies, but we never got back to that frequency again. I wish I had understood that if a 28 year old guy is content with once or twice a week, when he's 50, he really won't care if he gets it much at all.

The other half of the equation is my drive.  I've always really liked men, but when I met my H when I was 26, I wasn't very experienced. As I relaxed in the marriage, and began to explore my sexuality, and got older, my interest in sex itself increased. Honestly, three times a week would be the minimum, ideally.

So...you can have a couple in their twenties who are both okay with once or twice a week, and then 20 years later there's a major disparity in drives.[/quote]

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