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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=pbraverman]All of that said, I don't think a declaration of first choice usually plays a very big role in the process. It's seldom enough to make an unattractive candidate attractive, or vice-versa. With very few exceptions, schools offer admission to the applicants they want, and then deal with the cards as they're played.[/quote]
Thanks, and that's encouraging to hear.  Thinking about this some more, the real reason why this "first choice letter" issue weighs on me more than it should is the fact that our family has virtually no hook with any of the schools where we're applying.  All we have going for us are:  (1) being full pay, (2) DD's very high WPPSI scores, and (3) seemingly good play visits (but who knows).  We're not white, but not an URM.  We don't know any families who can put in a word on our behalf.  Our Ivy League degrees and professional careers are far from unique in this town.  So I feel powerless now that all the materials are in and have this nagging sense that we still "have to do something."  I simply don't trust that the process is going to work out for an unconnected family like ours, especially when we applied to the Big 3 and two somewhat selective schools.  I know anecdotally that completely unconnected families do end up at these schools, but that they're still in the vast minority.[/quote]

By way of comparison: (1) we are not full pay, (2) we are a URM, (3) DC's WPPSI was 90th percentile, (4) seemingly good play visit and (5) no hook/connections.  We were admitted to the school we sent a 1st choice letter to (BIG 3). We were admitted to two others with no first choice letter (highly selective), WL at one (highly selective) and not admitted to one (Big 3). At my DC's school I think you will have as good of a chance as we did. The schools aim at diversity extends beyond the so called URM's and non-Whites. From what I can tell by the various class make ups we have an equal number of Asians, AA, Hispanics, Whites who are international and a probably even higher number of kids of multi-ethic background. [/quote]

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