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[quote=pbraverman][quote=Anonymous][quote=pbraverman]All of that said, I don't think a declaration of first choice usually plays a very big role in the process. It's seldom enough to make an unattractive candidate attractive, or vice-versa. With very few exceptions, schools offer admission to the applicants they want, and then deal with the cards as they're played.[/quote]
Thanks, and that's encouraging to hear.  Thinking about this some more, the real reason why this "first choice letter" issue weighs on me more than it should is the fact that our family has virtually no hook with any of the schools where we're applying.  All we have going for us are:  (1) being full pay, (2) DD's very high WPPSI scores, and (3) seemingly good play visits (but who knows).  We're not white, but not an URM.  We don't know any families who can put in a word on our behalf.  Our Ivy League degrees and professional careers are far from unique in this town.  So I feel powerless now that all the materials are in and have this nagging sense that we still "have to do something."  I simply don't trust that the process is going to work out for an unconnected family like ours, especially when we applied to the Big 3 and two somewhat selective schools.  I know anecdotally that completely unconnected families do end up at these schools, but that they're still in the vast minority.[/quote]

These six weeks between the application deadline and notification are tough. You have little choice but to sit and wait, and in this town ... we are men of action. (Apologies for the sexism of the original!)

There are no formulas, but based on what you describe above, I wouldn't write your daughter off at all. If you'd like, send me a note offline. I'd be happy to talk for ten minutes and give you some read based on my experience — no charge, obviously. If not, I hope things work out for your family!

Peter
_____________________

Disclaimer: The anonymity here makes me uncomfortable; it's easy to be uninformed, personal, or simply mean-spirited if people don't identify themselves. For that reason, I have an account so you know whose words you're reading. I have more than 20 years' experience as a teacher and administrator in independent schools, and I have counseled hundreds of students in finding their next schools. I hope I can be helpful to some folks. If you don't like something I've said, you're in good company — there's a long line of past students and parents ahead of you. :) If you want to chat further, please feel free to contact me offline: peter &lt;at&gt; arcpd &lt;dot&gt; com[/quote]

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