Reply to Uninvited my sister from my wedding and wedding party.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Let me preface this by saying that I do not have a good relationship with my Mom and sister. I'm not sure why - in my adult years we have drifted apart. We do not have anything in common. I love them, but I do not generally like them as people.

Neither one of them has been supportive throughout my wedding planning process. [b]My FI and I had agreed we would not invite extended family because neither one of us is close to our extended cousins, plus they are all 10+ years older than I am.  My mom almost refused to come to my wedding, along with her family, until I invited the ENTIRE side of her family with her agreeing to pay for it. I told my mom this and she was deeply offended, and told me my aunts/uncles would not come unless their children and grandchildren were invited.[/b] So I am basically forced to invite them, grudgingly, but now my mom is happy and I can move on - whatever.

My sister has griped the entire time. She did not like my wedding dress - she called it "cheap!". She insulted the fabric that I chose for the BM dresses, said it was polyester. She insisted on going to another store to buy her dress when I said no, she had to go with at leas the same fabric and retailer because the store corresponds with the same store we are getting the ties for the groomsmen and it has to match.

Then, it came out that my Mom, my sister, and my ENTIRE mom's family is mad at me that I chose my wedding date before my sister did. My sister was engaged before I was, and apparently it's "etiquette" to wait for my sister to get married first?! She and her FI got engaged after 3 weeks of dating!!! My FI and I were dating for 2 years. It's ridiculous. I got frustrated and just told her not to come. All in all, it doesn't feel like a huge loss but I hate that I keep getting painted as the "bad guy". This is f*cking ridiculous.[/quote]

I'm confused... first you say you weren't going to invite extended family, then you said the aunts and uncles weren't going to come unless you invited their kids/grandkids.  Were you planning to invite some extended family members but not others, or were you not going to invite any of them until your mom started pushing?  Right or wrong, I know it would ruffle feathers in my family if I invited some extended family members but not others, especially if they were parents/children.

Also, you don't sound like you respect your sister's decision to get engaged... she may not be upset that you're getting married before her, but that you don't respect her upcoming marriage.  You mentioned how long they dated before getting engaged, but how long have they been engaged?  If they JUST got engaged, I can understand her feeling frustrated/feeling like you stole her thunder... Not something she should be hold against you, but something that it would be natural to feel a little upset about.  And since she talked about this to your mom, not to you, she may not have intended for you to even know she was feeling that way.

I guess I just feel like there's more to the story than what's being presented.[/quote]

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