Anonymous wrote:
Given that it's bridesmaids 101, why can't bridesmaids dresses be NICER? I know that's off-topic - but I really don't understand why the dresses are so shitty that no one wants to wear them.

OP, my goodness, just suck it up and let it go. Yes, your sister sounds annoying, but you are matching - if not surpassing her - in pettiness. No bridesmaid likes her dress. Yes, it is probably typical that the first engaged is the first married. Of course your sister should have kept her mouth shut about all this, but you are blowing it way out of proportion. Call your sister, tell her to wear anything she thinks would complement the wedding and wedding party (dollars to doughnuts she doesn't ultimately want to "stick out"), and decide you all just want to put this behind you. Your wedding - and life! - will be much improved.

Totally disagree. It's not about the wedding, it's about giving into bullying and manipulation - which does not improve your life.

What are you talking about? Her mom may be out of line, but the sum total of her sister's sins is bitching about her dress (which for better or worse, is Bridesmaids 101) and complaining to her Mom (not to OP) about the order of weddings. This is really petty shit. OP is blowing this way out of proportion.

Given that it's bridesmaids 101, why can't bridesmaids dresses be NICER? I know that's off-topic - but I really don't understand why the dresses are so shitty that no one wants to wear them.

Anonymous wrote:

OP, my goodness, just suck it up and let it go. Yes, your sister sounds annoying, but you are matching - if not surpassing her - in pettiness. No bridesmaid likes her dress. Yes, it is probably typical that the first engaged is the first married. Of course your sister should have kept her mouth shut about all this, but you are blowing it way out of proportion. Call your sister, tell her to wear anything she thinks would complement the wedding and wedding party (dollars to doughnuts she doesn't ultimately want to "stick out"), and decide you all just want to put this behind you. Your wedding - and life! - will be much improved.

Totally disagree. It's not about the wedding, it's about giving into bullying and manipulation - which does not improve your life.

What are you talking about? Her mom may be out of line, but the sum total of her sister's sins is bitching about her dress (which for better or worse, is Bridesmaids 101) and complaining to her Mom (not to OP) about the order of weddings. This is really petty shit. OP is blowing this way out of proportion.

Anonymous wrote:I would really, truly tell you and your fiance to get married in a civil ceremony first - just the two of you - and then go out to a special meal and just enjoy the day for yourselves. Then you can go ahead with the big, messy family day of crap and you won't be as annoyed because you know you've shared what's important with just the two of you and did it on your terms.

Anonymous wrote:Let me preface this by saying that I do not have a good relationship with my Mom and sister. I'm not sure why - in my adult years we have drifted apart. We do not have anything in common. I love them, but I do not generally like them as people.

Neither one of them has been supportive throughout my wedding planning process. My FI and I had agreed we would not invite extended family because neither one of us is close to our extended cousins, plus they are all 10+ years older than I am. My mom almost refused to come to my wedding, along with her family, until I invited the ENTIRE side of her family with her agreeing to pay for it. I told my mom this and she was deeply offended, and told me my aunts/uncles would not come unless their children and grandchildren were invited. So I am basically forced to invite them, grudgingly, but now my mom is happy and I can move on - whatever.

My sister has griped the entire time. She did not like my wedding dress - she called it "cheap!". She insulted the fabric that I chose for the BM dresses, said it was polyester. She insisted on going to another store to buy her dress when I said no, she had to go with at leas the same fabric and retailer because the store corresponds with the same store we are getting the ties for the groomsmen and it has to match.

Then, it came out that my Mom, my sister, and my ENTIRE mom's family is mad at me that I chose my wedding date before my sister did. My sister was engaged before I was, and apparently it's "etiquette" to wait for my sister to get married first?! She and her FI got engaged after 3 weeks of dating!!! My FI and I were dating for 2 years. It's ridiculous. I got frustrated and just told her not to come. All in all, it doesn't feel like a huge loss but I hate that I keep getting painted as the "bad guy". This is f*cking ridiculous.

OP, my goodness, just suck it up and let it go. Yes, your sister sounds annoying, but you are matching - if not surpassing her - in pettiness. No bridesmaid likes her dress. Yes, it is probably typical that the first engaged is the first married. Of course your sister should have kept her mouth shut about all this, but you are blowing it way out of proportion. Call your sister, tell her to wear anything she thinks would complement the wedding and wedding party (dollars to doughnuts she doesn't ultimately want to "stick out"), and decide you all just want to put this behind you. Your wedding - and life! - will be much improved.

Totally disagree. It's not about the wedding, it's about giving into bullying and manipulation - which does not improve your life.

Anonymous wrote:OP, my goodness, just suck it up and let it go. Yes, your sister sounds annoying, but you are matching - if not surpassing her - in pettiness. No bridesmaid likes her dress. Yes, it is probably typical that the first engaged is the first married. Of course your sister should have kept her mouth shut about all this, but you are blowing it way out of proportion. Call your sister, tell her to wear anything she thinks would complement the wedding and wedding party (dollars to doughnuts she doesn't ultimately want to "stick out"), and decide you all just want to put this behind you. Your wedding - and life! - will be much improved.