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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''

''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''
 
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''Dyslexic man walks into a bra''
 
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one - and let the other one off.           
 
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.  'It's not unusual' he replied.     
 
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says ''How do you drive this thing?''

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. ''But why?'' they asked, as they moved off. ''because,'' he said ''I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.''

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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes, he's a catholic converter.     
 
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A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: ''I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.''   
 
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(My favourites from a Facebook list. omg these are so funny to me. Especially the shitzu and Tom Jones ones).[/quote]

I don't get the shih tzu one.[/quote]

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