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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My DH told his ex-wife that a cat was a better mother and beyond an egg and a uterus, her contribution to their children was unremarkable. He also told her that she should be thanking me for being willing to step up and become the mother the kids had always deserved. All this about a week after we got custody of my stepkids. She really is a terrible mother. She sees the kids an average of one time a year for two or three days. The kids were 4 and 6 when we gained custody. They are 21 and 18 now and have almost no relationship with their biological mother. Still, those words haunt me because I know they had to devastate her. [/quote] and you feel good about being married to someone who would say this?[/quote] I responded to this same thing earlier - It was a very, very long time ago. She had been neglecting the kids and it was said right after he found out. I think it is probably the most insulting thing I have ever heard anyone say. I do "feel good" about being married to him because I understand why he said it. Imagine how you would feel if you found out someone had been harming your children. They were very little at the time - 4 and 6. Remember, he was awarded legal and physical custody. Judges very rarely award sole custody and it's even rarer for it to be given to a father. Think a little bit about what that means..... I do feel badly that she was hurt by it. Despite the fact that it's true, it must have been a horrible thing to hear.[/quote] I have no idea what the others are onto, but I would be EXTREMELY proud of your husband. Not only did he gain custody of his kids, he married a woman who became a mother to them and he recognized how wonderful you are. Personally, I don't care how their mother felt about hearing the truth; I think he was right to say it. Why? Because the children were being hurt and her feelings don't matter in this situation. You married a good man. A damn good man. And vice-versa. Thank you for being a mom, and not a step-mom. [/quote] Thank you! The kids were 4 and 6 when we got custody. They are 18 and 21 now! And they are just amazing kids! I am the lucky one :)[/quote] Come on! You post about how insulting the comment was and how it still haunts you and how it must have hurt the bio mom, yet you get indignant because someone questions the character of the person who made the comment??? You were the one who emphasized how bad and haunting the comment was. You should have added a disclaimer that the comment was made in the heat of moment and was totally out of character. By the way, my DH had custody of his kid too before we married. Her mom had serious issues , he never said anything like what you posted. My father was a drug addict when I was little... My mom never said anything like that ever... So yea maybe you should have posted a disclaimer instead of acting surprised that people were calling out ur DH. Just a thought ![/quote]
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