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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]DP As he should be.

Did the process involve action, meaning a legal proceeding and follow through? Or did you anonymously vent until, magically, you were divorced and able to pursue happiness with a considerate and respectful partner?

You took action. Good on you.
[/quote]

[quote]DP it's hilarious how you have spent so much time insisting it is horrible to vent about your husband and it all rests on the absurd notion that people who vent are not taking action to solve their problems.[/quote]

DP - You are responding to one post. However, the idea that it is awful to complain about your husband in derogatory terms has been advanced by several other posters, including me.

You seem to excuse using derogatory language (e.g., "lazy", "careless") about your husband by calling it "venting". What does this mean, exactly? Are you a steam engine, such that venting is a regular part of your day-to-day operations? Venting implies that a system has built up enough pressure that, unless the pressure is released, the system will be damaged.

Most likely, you do not have control of your emotions and need to lash out when you are upset. Calling it venting makes it easier to justify, since the implication is that your DH caused all of the problems you need to "vent" about and you can blame him (or others) for your lack of emotional control.[/quote]

What OP's DH did was lazy and careless. Those are accurate words to describe his actions.

There are mountains of research showing that women spend more time on childcare and housework than fathers and less time in leisure activities. [b]I get that you just want to blame the women for this for not communicating effectively[/b] or whatever, but the rest of us respect ourselves enough to know we are not here to parent our husbands. It takes a lot of time to "communicate" to people that the way they were raised is not going to work in a modern household. In the meantime, you bet I am going to find humor and solidarity with other women who experience similar ridiculous behaviors from our husbands. Sorry (not sorry) you don't like that.[/quote]

I think you explained well what some people have been trying to say - the husband is the first one that is responsible for creating this situation. He did a careless thing - no sane adult would think it is ok to leave a massive watermelon in the fridge without cutting it up and putting it into a container. So he engaged in a thoughtless, rude act. OP then confronted him about it and explained the problem with what he had done. Her husband did not care. At that point, OP decided that she was done trying to communicate because, honestly, if her husband couldn't figure out that she'd be upset with his actions then he's a moron (or he's lazy, careless, uncaring, whatever else). At that point OP could have explained again, and in more detail, what the issue was, but I feel like those of you acting like at that point her husband would have miraculously seen the error of his ways are deluding yourselves. Most likely he would have continued to not care and then gone on his trip. As a result, OP decided it wasn't worth another conversation and decided to vent anonymously and see if anyone else had any similar stories. Just let her do that and save your sanctimony for your own lives, where I'm sure you would never do something as thoughtless as what OP's husband did and you would never complain about anything your spouse did to anyone ever. [/quote]

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