Reply to How the hell is anyone supposed to get into college now?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How is it sad to admit your child needs extra help and get them a good tutor?

Am I missing something?[/quote]

I am not the PP. Reading the thread and the mentions of "sad" the word seems to relate to parents getting tutors early on just to have their kid barely cling to the top math group, or get into a top magnet high school, all the while pushing and pushing their kid to gun for ivies or even "lower" T20s when these colleges are filled with students who sailed through the hardest high school programs with no tutors. That is how I interpret it, for one: it is indeed sad to tiger-parent your child to try to be something they are not, rather than be in the math level they naturally should be in, even if that is just average in their ridiculous private school, and then trust the process that they will land in a college that suits them, where they have a chance to keep up with the other students or even stand out a little. This race to the top schools that everyone (on DCum) craves yet only a small portion of high school students academically can handle is troubling and wrong. Accept the kid you have at the level they naturally are. [/quote]

This is a very american middle class white attitude.  Find someplace you can excel at comfortably and go there.  Big fish small pond.
The asian immigrant attitude is to strive for the most challenging atmosphere and you might find yourself rising to the occasion.  Run with the swift.

They both have their pros and cons.[/quote]

I'm an asian and I pretty much agree that the top schools are really made for naturally gifted kids. And not Lake Wobegon gifted, but unusually gifted kids who would read Kant or study advanced math on their own even if not forced by a parent or school curriculum. It's not that really, really, hard workers without natural talents don't deserve to be there, but they won't have as good a time and are stressed beyond belief for very little ROI. Of course, everyone believes their kid is a genius, hence, all the striving for T25. [/quote]

There’s a lot to be said for this. I don’t think the top schools used to be this way though. Decades ago the kids I knew who got into T25 schools did not strike me as unusually gifted natural geniuses. I certainly met kids like that when I was at a top school but most of my classmates were “very smart but had to work hard” - like me.[/quote]
IMO, there are more children of educated parents today than years ago, hence more smarter kids.

My one kid has that "natural" smarts. My other doesn't.  DC is waaay smarter than either my spouse or myself. It's like they have our collective brain power.  The other DC is more like us -- not super smart, above average, but has to really study to get that A. The other DC doesn't.  They can do calculus in their head and does it for fun.  We don't know where they got this from. LOL[/quote]

This is a good point about their being more educated parents. Kids are far more enriched these days than back in the day because the parents are more educated. [/quote]

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