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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I agree with you completely. But you also have to do what the people hosting the wedding have decided. In your shoes, I left my kids at home with my husband and flew in for 36 hours for the wedding. I was really glad I did it - got quality time with my grandma, etc.

But yes, it is a bummer to attend a family wedding with a giant pile of aunts, uncles, cousins, siblings, and grandparents... but not kids.[/quote]

Why is it a bummer?[/quote]

Clearly you are not someone who values the opportunities to have large / extended families get together.  Those experiences are highlights of my childhood and adult life and something I deeply cherish so yes, disappointing to not have this opportunity.  [/quote]

NP here, there are lots of opportunities to have large/extended family gatherings (pre-COVID) but IMO it is often a thankless job organizing and becomes an issue of money, time, and the difficulties of not everyone being happy/agreeing with what is planned.  It’s like the little Red Hen, I think a lot of people value being the one attending the events with the kids and getting to see cousins etc but not to the extent of volunteering or looking for opportunities to take on responsibility for

-family reunions
-birthday parties for adults like grandma’s 95th birthday
-renting a beach house/vacation house together (that should be a subtopic on DCUM Family relationships unto itself)
-milestone anniversaries for parents, grandparents etc.
-hosting everyone for holidays so everyone can get together

To OP, I agree with posters of you want an event with the kids together, feel free to plan the event you want. It’s also perfectly valid to decide the childcare outweighs attending your cousin’s wedding, same as people declining because of financial constraints.  We haven’t attended any destination weddings because of cost.[/quote]

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