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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My 10yo complains about pretty much every sport or activity I try to sign her up for. She’s tried several things and was actually enjoying a ninja class for a few weeks, but now suddenly that is “boring” too.

At this point I am tired of fighting, tired of wasting money, and tired of dragging her to one weekly class while she complains in the back seat. I’m very tempted to just stop. No more trying to sell her on things. If she asks to do something, fine. Otherwise I’m done.

Is that terrible? Is 10 too young to just back off and stop trying for a while? And no, she does not have unlimited screen time or her own tablet.

Would love to hear from anyone who has been through this.

- Exhausted mom[/quote]

OP, my kid was like yours, complaining about every activity, for years….  DD would want to quit, or not even start an activity, through some combination of 1) it stopped being fun because she had to work at it, 2) she was a little embarrassed at being an older beginner, and/or 3) she didn’t have friends in the class with her.  She also has anxiety about trying new activities and going to new places.

One time, i told her in a really firm voice “no matter how much you complain, you have to do X activity.  You know how school is mandatory, and no matter what, you have to go?  Well that’s how I feel about [X].  Until you start high school, [X] is non-negotiable, period.”  I think subconsciously, she must’ve thought that if she wore me down enough, I’d let her quit, but I must’ve finally convinced her that this was not the case, and she stopped complaining.

In addition, I think it helped a lot that I did let her drop some things and she felt “heard.”  For instance, she wanted to quit both gymnastics and piano, and I told her that I’d let her quit gymnastics, but only if she continued piano, without complaint, and did some minimal practice like 3x a week for 45 minutes.  She was so happy to quit gymnastics and has actually kept her side of the bargain for the last six months, which if you knew my DD, is practically a miracle.

Anyway, this is my long way of saying I wouldn’t just let her quit altogether.  If I were you, I’d negotiate a compromise with her that works for both of you.  Something that involves her continuing say one activity -without complaint- but gives her something she wants in turn.  The carrot you give her has to be something she finds compelling enough though.   [/quote]

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