Reply to Stopping caring saved my marriage

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Stopping caring saved my marriage"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Who cares that he didn't book anything for three months.

This goes back to the original premise of this thread. [b]Why is she  "assigning" him this task. If this is something that's important to her, she should just book it for them.[/b]

Asking him to make something that's a priority for you a priority for him doesn't work. People don't work that way.

My DH has never booked a trip or made social plans for us. it's not important to him, but it is important to me. For a while I tried to force him to do it, it just made us both miserable.

Now if I want to do something i just book it. He will go and enjoy himself, but he's not a planner. It's not his thing. He has other things that he takes care of that are a priority for him, and I appreciate that.[/quote]

1000x this.   My DH is a great husband and dad - if anything he has probably used some of the techniques here because he is the one that cleans up dishes right away, cooks etc.  That said, I would have booked the cooking class in the example above because it would be more important to me that it be done.  I also would go into it thinking it gives us something to talk about and hopefully a nice meal to try to make at home.  Not necessarily that this would be our thing.

BTW, when I was casually floating the idea with my male co-workers at lunch that DH and I will need a couples hobby for when the kids out the house they made faces like WTF - why would you want to do that.  It was funny to me because from atleast the outside looking in they are 50/50 partners in household work and with the kids, the wives have high paying careers, they take vacations or days off to spend with the wife, and have been married a long time ....but coming up with a joint hobby was clearly crazy talk.  My point being if I make it the test of my marriage, my DH's willingness to both agree to and plan for us to participate in some joint hobby, I would focusing on the trees and not seeing the forest ...and adding unnecessary drama.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics