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[quote=Anonymous]Poster with 11yo - first of all, none of these “topics” were introduced at home. She learned about them at school, from friends, and from media (tv shows and magazines). We talk about them because they are something that is being discussed a lot among her friends. No, of course I don’t think she has it all figured out, but she does know that gender and sexuality are different things and each has a spectrum, which is correct and fine for her to know and begin to understand. “Allowing” her to understand these things is not harming her. Since several of her friends have “changed their pronouns” and others have changed their names and/or the way they present to the world, I am glad that she is sensitive enough to respect her friends and accept them and address them they way they want to be addressed. She’s in 6th grade. She has no sexual feelings and has told me many times that she knows she is cis, so I expect that she, along with a number of other cis girls, are trying to be allies by keeping their own sexuality open. She also has a number of friends who identify as gay - both girls and boys - and again, I don’t love the rushing to label oneself, but I respect these kids and I’m glad my daughter respects them. 
Mostly I appreciate that she’s growing up in an environment that allows kids to “experiment” at this age which is all fine and normal (and there’s no talk about drugs so I don’t know what that other poster was going off on a tangent about drugs and grandchildren...). And I’m glad it’s an environment where kids aren’t afraid to come out or to be who they are. That’s MUCH healthier for all, even if it means a few straight kids self-identify as bi or whatever for a while, and then they change their minds. 
The most important thing for kids is that they feel heard and they have adults they trust who they know respect them. My daughter (and her close friends) all have this. One of her best friends confided something to me recently and it was something I knew her parents would want to know. I encouraged her to open up to them which she did, and I know it’s made their relationship stronger. It had nothing to do with gender or sexuality (or drugs?!) but it was a somewhat challenging subject for this child and her parents but she felt she could ask me for advice and I’m glad she felt safe doing that. If we spend more time telling kids they’re wrong or stupid or “too woke” and not enough time engaging and listening to them we will have another generation of kids who lose their way. [/quote]

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