Reply to Women 35+ who have never been in a relationship

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I know two women like this. One comes on way too strong too soon (clingy) and then ends up hung up on the guy for months longer than she ever dated him, which prevents her from meeting someone new.[b] She was talking about a guy she dated for 2 months for the better part of a year, including weekly therapy.[/b] Nothing especially traumatic happened either.

The other one is a very outgoing, loud personality and uncompromising in all areas of her life. She is fabulous, pretty, has a good career, very busy social life with plans most evenings but it would take someone with a similar lifestyle who also didn't mind sharing the spotlight and I think that is rare. [/quote]

Yeah, I know someone like this, too. And to make matters worse, the men she obsesses over are players or emotionally unavailable. So she gets in this cycle of casually dating or hooking up with someone for a few weeks who isn't relationship material and doesn't want a relationship, then obsessing over them after they leave her for a year or so, then repeating the cycle. So she's never really paired up with someone, and is always in some state of deep angst.
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Back to main question: why?  I think my one friend who is in this boat at 38 says it was about missing early chances (likely undiagnosed ADHD) and then it becomes harder and harder to find guys without baggage (divorce, kids or both multiple times).

Think she was a romantic who aspired to tall dark and handsome (and given her pretty should have gotten one of these

She didn’t realize ‘love’ is a timed event.[/quote]  There is some truth to this.

I loved that my very traditional parents never pressured me to settle down…but I would have appreciated a heads up about the window of opportunity.

I just think my mom did not know any better. She was not well educated or well traveled. She married her childhood sweetheart…I think when she became pregnant (which was scandalous at the time).

She had no insights to offer a woman on such a different track. [/quote]

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