Reply to If you had an affair with a married person

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Affairs are very much about getting scraps/breadcrumbs of love and I think pp understands that.  that dynamic is why they happen- you don’t think you need or deserve better than someone’s scraps.  For me I just thought I wanted something sexual and when I started feeling things for the person I went into a complete panic, because I wanted whatever they could give me and I knew it would end terribly.[/quote]

Not necessarily true. You can live with a man for 20 years and have no idea how he is capable to love someone else. He gives himself all to the AP. In this case, it is the wife who gets scraps. But it also depends on your values. I value true feelings and a moment. If you value your house, retirement account, and other assets, then maybe you are correct, the AP is getting scraps.[b] But putting finances aside, I think AP is getting a true and genuine relationship (assuming the man is open that he is married)[/b].[/quote]

OMG. Please, just no.  So many men go out for variety after the same thing for 20 years in midlife.  IT has zero to do with love.  Did Clinton love Lewinski?  Hugh, Divine Brown?  Adam Levine, whatever the hell her name was?  Men have sex all of the time for the sake of sex.

Women on this site need to stop thinking like a woman when they ascribe feelings to cheating men. And to say a woman is solely valuing assets if she reconciles is absolutely ridiculous.  There is a lot of unprocessed resentment and anger for the wife in that post.[/quote]

I know you won’t believe me or anyone else, but some men truly do want friendship as part of an affair.  Not all men are the same and not all women are the same.  Yes, many men are only after sex, but not all.  [/quote]

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