Reply to My adult step-daughter wants to move in with us

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What bio parents do for young adult kids in these situations. My BIL bought his DS, 22 a house where he lives with his 20 year old sister. Closer to sister's college. Nephew is working at a small store, has issues too, learning and parents were also legally separated. His dd is in college and going slowly to intern for some political career. Both bio parents are on board with this arrangement, as BIL can afford it and their kids need help. Nobody has criticized their decision or told them to kick the adult kids to the curb. There is no step parents involved. We are all glad BIL is taking care of his son and daughter, and hope thing will work out after college didn't. They are not immigrants, white Americans for generations. This is a story I see in any families, my dd is here for the weekend from college to get some sleep. My ds in college worked one summer and earned a ton, one summer he was struggling with depression and anxiety(he has been struggling since 4 years old with these, I post on SN forum a lot) and we encouraged him to get treatment and not to work, he trained for his sport(college athlete) and he recovered and is now doing really well as a junior in college. This is what bio parents do, we never give up on our kids. Do we wish things were better, yes, but we help all the time as much as we can. One day, OP, you will do all this for your bio kid, try to be emphatic for your husband and his daughter. Nobody wants their kids to fail, but when they do we pick up the pieces, we always pick up the pieces as long as we live, if we are a normal functioning loving family.[/quote]

This has nothing to do with the topic.  Adult child is living with mom.  Mom is not kicking her out.  The adult child you are referring to is working and needs support.  Different situation.[/quote]
Not different at all. It isn't like nephew was working the whole time. There was the drugs and not doing anything period of time too. [b]OP's stepdd needs support, [/b]OP would not blink and do all this for her kid, she just doesn't get it yet. She is jealous of her dh's dd. It makes her look petty and insecure.[/quote]

Support to . . . not get a job or go back to school?

No, she doesn't need support.  She needs to take steps toward adulthood, which she is trying to *avoid* by switching from Mom's house to Dad's house.  That shouldn't be encouraged or enabled.  [/quote]

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