Reply to Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I get it, you wanted to punish her, and maybe she deserves it, but in the end you have to think about if your actions are contributing to the dysfunctions in your relationship or changing things, and by saying what you did, you heightened her insecurities, hurt her feelings, etc. it didn’t help.[/quote]

OP here. True. It wasn't a script I had written in advance... [/quote]

Did you apologize?[/quote]

OP here. I did not. I did say I was sorry I hurt her, but I did not apologize for the content of my words. I am very much struggling with myself regarding my own feelings on that. I feel that once I've been "left to take care of my own needs", and she's shown no desire to be a part of that (and I would not want to force it upon her if it's against her will)... then this is one aspect of our life that we no longer do as a couple. So... while I can't demand anything of her - it goes both ways... at least that's how I sometimes feel. It's not exactly how I would have wished our relationship to be.[/quote]

So you acknowledge your behavior was shitty but defend it as not really wrong because she made you do it. Dude, you're a jackass, no wonder she won't sleep with you.[/quote]

I understand the OP. It's not saying that it is her fault for the comment, and that is why he apologized for hurting her feelings.

However, there comes a point in a relationship, when you feel as though you are apologizing and letting someone off the hook while they take no responsibility for their own actions.

He is sorry that he hurt her and he apologized. But why would he say sorry for the comment itself. The comment itself was meant to make the statement, that if she was not involved in his sex life, then she is not entitled to an answer about his sex life... He still feels that way. Therefore, he is not apologizing.[/quote]

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