Reply to I'm much meaner on DCUM than IRL. AMA.

Forum Index » Off-Topic

Reply to "I'm much meaner on DCUM than IRL. AMA."

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]That's the thing though.  If you read my OP, you'll see that I'm really NOT insecure.  I'm not perfect - hey, judgmental obviously! - but insecurity isn't something I struggle with.  Which makes me wonder why I do this.

I also don't curse on DCUM, though I do IRL.  Like poor grammar and spelling, it renders posts irrelevant IMO.[/quote]
Just because you said you're not insecure in your OP, doesn't mean you're not. I assume that you are very insecure.  Also, pointing out someone's poor grammar and spelling just means that you have nothing to add to the discussion. Do you really think you have to have perfect grammar to offer advice on parenting or anything else (except for grammar, of course).[/quote]

Why does someone have to be insecure to have strong opinions?  I genuinely don't get why that's a go-to.  Sure, say I'm bitchy or judgmental or snooty - that makes more sense.  But how does insecure even play in?[/quote]

Truly insecure people often lack empathy because they're so focused on their own (perceived) failures and deficiencies.  Basically, they're self-absorbed in a negative way, often not consciously.  So they have a more difficult time seeing issues from other people's points of view, and in turn can have trouble showing compassion or true support of others.

Interestingly, I think if you asked many deeply insecure people, they would say they are VERY empathetic.  But I think many people confuse being empathetic (feeling/understanding things from other people's perspectives, even if they and their circumstances differ from your own) with being sensitive (feeling things deeply).  Many, many deeply insecure people are sensitive.  It's a factor that amplifies their own negative feelings about themselves.  But being sensitive does not necessarily mean that one can let go of their own point of view, personal history, wants and needs long enough to consider something through someone else's eyes.

No clue where OP falls in all this.  Just wanted to offer her some food for thought.  Clearly there's something driving her meanness on this board.  I'm curious what it may be.  I obviously don't have much information to go on, but my personal guess is that it IS insecurity.  What she lists as small/typical day-to-day complaints are surprisingly broad.  They cover all categories of her life, it seems.  [/quote]

Op here - can you give an example of the "complaints in all areas of life" you mention?[/quote]

I was referring to your original post:

[b]"[T]he everyday annoyances that we all have, obviously - with my marriage, my career, my kids, my financials, my educational/intellectual background and my appearance."[/b]

To me, that seemed to cover all areas of your life.

I get that you were referring to annoyances you consider to be small, and you assume that "we all" have them, "obviously."  But I'm not sure that is true.  Personally, I have zero "annoyances," issues or discomforts in a few of the categories you list above.

Overall, your original post suggests you're carrying quite a bit of negativity about your own life.  Maybe even more than you realize.  You seem seem to be dismissing it as normal and typical, when I'm not sure it is.  Is it possible that you're making unkind comments on DCUM as a way of venting or dulling the regular annoyances or frustrations or even anger you feel about your own life?

[/quote]

I meant things like my kids wake up early, my house need a deck refinish, etc. hardly definitive of an unhappy life, in my estimation.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics