Reply to Husband is furious at me for telling his mother to stop talking down to me at dinner

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Reply to "Husband is furious at me for telling his mother to stop talking down to me at dinner"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You were wrong to check your phone at the table. You should have ignored her instead of responding. Did you really think any good would have come out of responding?  And couldn’t you see the impact responding would cause?

And you’ve got to give her a break given your FIL’s condition. She’s got to be sad and scared. [/quote]

Would you give the same advice if the genders were reversed and the MIL or FIL berated the son-in-law for looking at their phone?

My family litmus test is “would this be acceptable or likely behavior if this was a close friend”?  Would the MIL have berated their good friend for looking at a phone, would you have responded in that way if it was your close friend that said that to you, would the spouse have said nothing to de-escalate the situation of a close friend going thru a tough time berating their wife about looking at their cell phone, leave even when they could have stayed behind after the confrontation, and then go out to party with different friends on NYE?  I understand it’s different with the emotional bonds and parent child relationships and spouse relationships are different than friends.  However, the bar of how we treat each other should be higher with family because of those bonds than how we treat friends when often it’s reversed because the BS bar is far lower with friends and that relationship is not guaranteed.[/quote]

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