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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Back in my 30’s I had three AP’s over an 8 year period. We were raising 2 DC’s, parenting well, building careers and having regular, if uninspired, sex. 
I’m the kind of guy that doesn’t seek and rarely has had sex for the sake of having sex. I fell in love with all 3 AP’s and the affairs ended when the relationships reached the point where I either had to leave DW or end the relationships. I ended them and it was painful. Divorced a few years later, remarried and been monogamous since. 
In retrospect, I think the relationship with DW was missing something which is why I was open to an AP.  [/quote]

In it now, and trying to break it off.  I generally agree, affairs are a result of something wrong in the relationship, could be lack of sex or something else.  Not trying to justifying it, but it's a symptom, not a cause.[/quote]

Not really.  Affairs are because there’s something missing in you, not someone else.  [/quote]

Sorry, I wasn't implying there was something missing in my wife, but there was something definitely missing in my relationship with my wife.  Yes, sure, there is something missing in me that I wasn't able to stay faithful in a sexless marriage, and something missing in her in refusing to have sex rather than use her words and sort through why.  I am also faithful and happy now in a second marriage, but it breaks my heart for me kids who are the collateral damage from two people who couldn't make a marriage work.  We are co-parenting well.[/quote]

For the PP and other who prefer to castigate the writer, examine your own motivations.  Because, what he is saying is absolutely true for many affairs, including mine.[/quote]

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