Reply to Anyone’s child get pregnant during college?

Forum Index » College and University Discussion

Reply to "Anyone’s child get pregnant during college?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]She should have an abortion

Try hard to convince her OP. That is what would be best for a 21 year old.[/quote] Turn this around to "try hard to get her to give birth" and what would your reaction be? What part of choice do you not understand?[/quote]

You’re living in la la land if you think the average 21 yo is financially or emotionally prepared to be a parent.

Go read the parenting boards.

People in their thirties with college, graduate school, and years of life and job experience still find it overwhelming and often claim it is “the hardest thing” they’ve ever done, emotionally speaking.

And these are typically UMC people who have lots of surplus money to throw at their problems (seriously, how often do you see “go hire a house cleaner” as a solution to an OP?)

These are people who wanted and planned on their babies and have all their ducks in a row. And it’s still hard AF![/quote]

If you can't see what serious potential future problems you'd be setting yourself up for by pushing your adult daughter to have an abortion....we can't help you. [/quote]

And if you can’t see the problem with pressuring someone to put a baby up for adoption, we can’t help you.

Or if you can’t with having a baby at 20 with no degree, no partner for support, and no money or means of financial support— at a time when Medicaid is being dismantled, CHIP is being defunded, TANF and SNAP are being severely cut, etc, we can’t help you.  We get it, you are pro-birth. But poor-Birthers like to end the story as soon as the beautiful white bay is born. If they didn’t, they would have to explain why. There is no social safety net for a young girl, alone with a screaming infant, worried that the kid is sick and unable to take them to the doctor because it is too expensive.  Plus, if the kid is sick, the crappy daycare they could afford won’t take them, so they cam’t atrend class. And they can’t afford to fix the car or pay for gas, so they need to take the baby on the bus. And they don’t know how they can afford to feed the kid after the second week of the month, so they are skipping meals.

If you think this is okay... we can’t help you.

There are no great options. [/quote]

FYI you're responding to more than one person. But: yes, there absolutely are no great choices. The thing is that the daughter needs to make this decision HERSELF, and then deal with the consequences - which, again, exist no matter what she chooses (...[b]yes, apparently some of you are able to get abortions and then never give it a second thought or feel a morsel of guilt[/b], but OP's daughter obviously is not like you). If, however, her parents make the decision for her or push her into one, she will then blame THEM for the consequences. [/quote]

NP: I agree with the sentiment that the daughter needs support to see all the consequences of her decision and then be permitted to make those choices--whether to raise the baby, put up for adoption or abort the pregnancy.  Your passive-aggressive framing that those who get abortions should feel guilt is unneeded in this conversation that has otherwise been fairly constructive.  In my worldview it is more ethical to opt not to carry a pregnancy to term when one is not ready to care for a child.  I would feel far more guilt if I chose to have a baby when I was in an uncommitted relationship, emotionally and financially unready  or if I  gave a baby up for adoption and gave up responsibility for knowing his/her well-being.  You have a different view that I can understand because you have a different belief system about our responsibilities to a fetus vs. my views on our responsibilities to a child.  I am fine with this as long as everyone has their ethics and choices respected.   [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics