Reply to Nephew with celiac - what is fair/appropriate when visiting grandma?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, this is not what you want to hear but here goes. Why are you allowing your 4 year old to have such a limited diet? Kids learn from their homes. Forget the gluten issue. Fill you home with a variety of good food, and keep presenting it. Your kids will eat more than chicken nuggets soon enough. Unless they have a rare disorder, your children will not starve themselves if you give them different foods on a consistent basis. It would also help if you and your DH ate differently, and served everyone one meal. Don't serve kid meals. Unless, god forbid, you are also eating chicken nuggets. You do realize that the nutritional value of food out of a package is not very high, right? [/quote]

OP here - people parent differently and I totally disagree with you.  My older one used to be like his little brother but little by little he has gotten more open minded and we are encouraging him without forcing him.  I believe my LO will too over time, so this is just a battle I choose not to fight at this age, esp. While on 'vacation' when other stressors are present.[/quote]

OP, I parent a lot like you around food, and it worked out well for us.  My 4 year old had an extremely restricted diet for medical reasons as a toddler, and while he was past that at 4, he was still learning to like a lot of foods, and had a pretty restricted palate.  I was committed to not power struggling about it, and he pretty much ate what he was comfortable eating.  With no pressure his palate naturally expanded, and now he eats almost everything, but it was a gradual process that took years.

Having said that, even as a parent of a kid who sounds similarly picky to yours at that age, and who was committed to not power struggling around food, I felt comfortable telling my son at 4 "At Grandma's house you can choose from the food that is served.  If you're still hungry, you can have a snack later we have pb&j, and cheese and crackers in our room, or in the car on the way home", and telling Grandma "I'd like to include one thing I know he will eat at this meal.  I don't see anything on the table, can I add some milk and sliced apples to the meal?"  Sometimes that approach lead to him deciding he would try the roast chicken or the mashed potatoes or whatever, and sometimes that kind of an approach lead to a snack of milk and apples and a second dinner later.

I totally agree that a trip, with all the stressors of traveling, is not the time to be turning a kid's diet upside down or introducing a power struggle.

I'll also say that I wouldn't consider visiting extended family to be a vacation.  There's really nothing vacationy about it.  Framing it in your mind as doing your duties by the in laws, and helping your kids build family bonds, rather than as a vacation might help you feel less resentful, than if you go into it with the mindset that it's supposed to be a vacation.  [/quote]

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