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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am confused by this thread and by general conversation in this forum. People talk about sex with spouses as if it is another chore, like taking trash out or taking kids to school. They talk in terms of outcomes. If you give your spouse sex you will keep your marriage. If you don't give your spouse sex you will end up cheated on or divorced.
What about feelings? I mean how can you have satisfying sex without deep intimacy, connectedness, giddy feelings, excitement?
I married later in life to a husband 8 years younger than me. If we don't feel like having sex for a week or two or even a month we are totally ok. We don't obsess over sex. [b]We have sex when we feel deeply connected.[/b] I guess I don't know how else to have sex...
[/quote]

I'm sorry to be blunt,  but you sound like a woman who has no idea how her husband's anatomy and biological drive work. You project the way [i]you [/i]feel about sex onto your husband.

My husband and I have sex nearly every night and yet nearly every morning he masturbates before work.  Why?  Because sometimes he wants touchy feely romantic sex and sometimes he just wants to cum. I promise you your husband is not only having sex with he feels deeply connected.  That's you.  He may not be having an affair at all, it may just be between him and his hand.

And if you don't know this about him, it's because you don't have the super close intimate relationship you think you have with him. [/quote]

You sound like YOU are projecting on PP. PP has a happy marriage and sex life where they don't worry too much about frequency but it happens regularly and isn't a hot topic issue in their marriage. I'm sure maybe her husband masturbates. PP didn't say anything about that at all. They are different activities that don't always relate to one another. No one is arguing anything else here in this side bar.

If she and her husband are happy why do you feel the need to try to bring her down. My DH and I are super happy and have sex about once a week, sometimes a little longer in between. He's fine with it, I'm fine with it, I think both of us help ourselves out from time to time, we're fine with that too. I would agree that he doesn't get the emotional high from sex I do as much or as often but this works for us. If I had to have sex with my husband every day my vagina would hurt so much, nothing about what you described seems like a happy life to me. But that is your life and it works for you. I'm not saying you're doing it wrong, don't tell us we're doing it wrong. People are different and need different things. You are the only one making broad claims about an entire gender, not PP. [/quote]

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