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[quote=Anonymous]I think we were not truly poor but that my mom just made TERRIBLE decisions with money. If she had a whit of sense about her when it came to money we'd have had a normal middle class upbringing. My father made good money and paid plenty of child support ($1000/month in the nineties) and she worked. But she partied and never paid bills and spent her money on stupid shit like breast implants and diet pills and going out. Some things I remember:

Coming home from school and the power being shut off. Still off that night when she told us to light some candles, order a pizza and she went out. In a new outfit she had bought at Stein Mart that day for her date.

Having to leave a buggy of stuff at Kmart when her check was declined.

Knowing we didn't get much for Christmas but trying to not let her feel sad about not buying us much.

Once in middle school I knew we had no food at home to pack a lunch for school the next day and my mom had no money. I was at my aunts house and wanted to pack a lunch there to take home with me the next day but not doing it because I didn't want to explain to her why I needed to "borrow" her food for lunch.

Her car broke down once on the side of the road. Engine was blown because she didn't bother to change the oil for 3 years.

Even these things stayed with me. To this day I hate the idea of filling up my gas tank in my car because I think "What if I need the money more and there's $75 just tied up in my gas tank??" It drives my DH nuts but I can't help it. I pay bills at the last possible second too because again, I just fear not having the money. Big purchases make me very anxious even if we can afford them. It's like I always fear some huge emergency hitting us when we least expect it because that was life with my mom- easily preventable situations cropping up and costing a lot of stress, time, money because she just made such terrible choices. [/quote]

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