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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, after moving for an ex and then ending up in a far away state across the country (literally the farthest point I could possible live) I have been living a nightmare. If I could go back in time I would’ve consulted a lawyer immediately. It could’ve saved me a bunch of moves which have burned me - I thought going back to work, finding my own place that was bigger to fit my kids would help me but they haven’t. If I could back I would stay in the house and not work so I could collect alimony and child support. Please get a lawyer asap. [/quote]

Thank you and I’m sorry. I’m so angry that he would tell me after business hours and when he knows I am caring for our child full-time this week with zero camps or sports practices. I’m furious. He knew exactly what he was doing. [/quote]

Tell him he needs to take your son for a couple of days next week, since you need to look for and consult an attorney. You’re not obligated to make sure he can work unbothered by parental responsibilities. He did this, and now he can deal with some of the immediate fallout. [/quote]

Jokes on me. Kid and I were supposed to go on a quick trip next week before school started and DH was going to meet with some workers at the house and watch the dog (dogsitter/ranches all booked because of the holiday week). At the “last minute” early last week, a work trip for this week popped up. Conveniently.

I have been talking to friends all evening sharing the amount of information that is appropriate and one of them might be able to take my kid for a morning if any of the attorneys are in town next week. Pray they’re haven’t already been conflicted out by DH.[/quote]

Go on the trip. You can talk to the lawyers on the phone there. This is a marathon not a sprint. [/quote]

I can’t. DH was going to WFH with the dog and we don’t have a dogsitter or spot at a dog camp. All of DH’s stuff is here and he’s been coming a few times a week to eat dinner with us and watch our kid’s activities. I thought he was being true to what we had discussed- taking some time and space to regroup. Apparently he was happy to eat off plates I had washed and grab laundry I’d washed last month before going off to his lawyer’s lair.

I didn’t fully understand when he told me last night because I was a wreck but the *actual filing* is happening and I’m being served next week. Which may be why he hightailed out of town and forced me to stay in town.

Who serves the mother of his child?

Monster.[/quote]

Everyone serves their spouse. Nothing monstrous about it. [/quote]

Nah, only a monster serves the person watching their kids w/o notice or warning. This is inarguably a dick move. It's also going to work against him if he starts being uncooperative, and it's going to cost him more because they're going to duke shit out in court rather than having civil conversations and getting their ducks in a row before filing.

He's a gobshite. No question. He's the AH.[/quote]

READ. She hasn’t been served. He did the courteous thing and notified her that he’d filed. Are you sockpuppeting, OP; or are there this many hapless people on DCUM?[/quote]

THINK. Smart people discuss the terms of their divorce before dragging it out in front of a court. "they were separated". Yeah. SEPARATED. It's not the same. Sometimes people separate and then reconnect. Sometimes, they separate so they can cool off and file with a clear head. "Hey, btw, I filed" isn't the mature, respectful, decent thing to do. A divorce is a 2-party event. "Hey, this is happening" is a unilateral decision.

Sorry you're so selfish/myopic. [/quote]

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