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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "DH choked me"
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[quote=Anonymous]I think there is a huge difference between a hand/hands on the neck and slight pressure (NOT enough to restrict the airway!) versus actual choking (holding the neck or putting pressure on it in any way that restricts breathing). The first is fine and can be sexy: it is one person showing vulnerability and giving power to the other in the knowledge that this power will not be misused to hurt. The second is dangerous and a bad idea. OP, if you have been doing the latter, definitely stop, and your husband should stop. If you have been doing the former and in the heat of the moment you felt it crossed to the latter, you should (As you have) tell him never again. But unless he routinely violates your boundaries, dissociates during sex, or is otherwise abusive (in which case, multiple red flags), I would not write him off. I'd just be really really clear that that can't happen again. If he is not a jerk he will get it and be careful.[/quote]
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